Mad Men Recap While Drunk 05×03 “Tea Leaves”

I like Mad Men and drinking.  I will combine the two and write down thoughts that are in no way in-depth or insightful.

Tonight’s drink is a six pack of Harpoon Celtic Ale.  It’s not good but I’m not a beer guy so don’t judge me.

Not pictured: Four other beers.

LOL THE KILLING.  I forgot about that monstrosity.  Who Killed Rosie Larson?  Who Killed AMC’S Streak of Great Shows?

Oh directed by Jon Hamm.  Exciting.

Betty is fat.  And is trying to get out of things using “Womanly things” as an excuse.  I’m jealous of the fact that excuse still works today for them.  Saying you don’t want to go out due to “Manly Things” makes it sounds like you’re masturbating.

Awkward dinner conversation with a client.  Kids and the loud music and The Rolling Stones.  And the beans guys wants The Rolling Stones to sing a jingle?  I guess no one over 30 knows The Rolling Stones are huge.

I love the shop talk with the airline and the fact I have no idea what they are really talking about.

They hired an African-American.  Love it.  And Harry is super weird around her and got Rolling Stones tickets?  Are the Rolling Stones actually going to appear in this episode?

Is Betty actually fat or fake fat?  I mean in real life.  I think she was pregggers but looks Eddie Murphy fake fat.  Betty is dropping haymakers on this bitch.  “WHY DON’T YOU TAKE SPEED BITCH” was the subtext.

“He’s a good-looking version of Don.” is what people say to me all the time.  Or never.

Betty needs those pills.  Those sweet sweet pills.  And now she has throat cancer?  Maybe not.  Where is Henry!?!?!  “Everything is going to be OK” is said with the same tone as me saying, “Maybe we’ll go to Dennys for lunch.”

Betty likes Dennys.

I SPOTTED A BOTTLE OF JAMESON!

Michael Ginsberg sounds like every stereotypical New Yorker Jew ever.  I hate his jacket. I’m sure I’ll learn to love him like every other character except for Betty.

I like Betty’s cancer friend.  I like that Betty collects these fuck-up friends and then talks to them like humans unlike everyone else in their life.  Never trust a gypsy.

Don’s apartment is so baller.  I would move in there with all of that exact furniture in an instant.

If they actually show The Rolling Stones I’m going to flip out.  Don is barely amused with Bewitched jokes.

Charlton Heston is handsome?  Of course the chubby teen likes Harry.  Don is doing market research on teens.  Bidness Don.  Also, Wisdom Don telling a 14-year-old all guys want to do is bang.  Of course Harry got punked by The Stolling Rones.  Harry is stoned and eating 20 White Castle burgers.  Love it.  I’m back on team Harry.  Don saying the Stone aren’t good for anyone.  I disagree.

Montreal is upset with Don about something but I don’t get it.  She really wants to go to Fire Island very badly.  She has hates braces but I’m just assuming that.

Why is the resume on a crinkly paper?  Michael had a much better pitch this time around and Peggy is upset with him because he did well?  I don’t get what’s going on but he got the job.  Go Mikey!

Betty is getting the news…..and…..it’s good!  Now she has faced death, she can be nice again for the first time!  I’m sure she’s going to be happy and normal for now and eternity.

Or not.

Pete’s play on Roger was pretty smart but also desperate because it’s Pete and he always looks desperate.  Not sure if I can handle Roger getting emotional.  Oh Don talking about cancer and life and stuff just leads to more questions.

“When is everything going to be back to normal?” Never Roger.  Never.

Lil Mikey is getting bar mitzahed cause he got the job?  L’Chaim brother.

Betty, nor anyone in modern America, would let that ice cream to go waste.

Bye!

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One Response to Mad Men Recap While Drunk 05×03 “Tea Leaves”

  1. Ron Donald says:

    I love these articles so much.

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