Mad Men Recap While Drunk 05×12 “Commissions and Fees”

I watch Mad Men and drink and make snarky (no one uses that term anymore) remarks about the episode.

It’s an away game for me this week as I’m at my parents’ house. I’m chugging a 2009 Girard Chardonnay but I am more accurately devouring this…



Oh hi Italian stereotypical barber. Do you offer pizza along with a fresh shave?

Fee vs Commission! Exciting stuff that I don’t understand at all! Don’s jab about the voting while he’s out of the room was a nice touch.

This is the episode where Lane goes down. Nice to see Don trying to cover him, if you ever start to lead a second life, make sure there’s a “Don” around to give you guidance and protect you.

Of course Lane makes a vague sexual reference toward Joan. LEAVE JOAN ALONE SHE’S HAVING A VERY TOUGH WINTER! AND THOSE BREASTS! MY GOD THE BACKACHES!

Don is tired of the small time and wants a chemical company. I’m sure there’s a lot of exciting advertising for plastics and other forms of plastics and other other forms of plastics. “No used to make you hard, ” what one rapist says to a former rapist.

Sally in the big city! I’m excited and terrified. I like that Megan (or MegHan, I can’t decide) has tried to take up big sister relationship with her.

I don’t really understand what Ken was doing with Roger, for his silence he gets to work on the account if they get it? And Ken REALLY seemed upset about not doing any work to land the client, like everything is going to HELL if if does a BIT of work.

This really is not a better time for Lane’s wife to buy an unreliable car. Really could not have been more perfect. Lane seems thrilled.

“Mayor Bloomberg just shat himself at how much sugar Sally poured into the coffee.” – Neal990

Jaguar. Finally something beautiful you can truly own that won’t help you commit suicide since you embezzelled money from work. Why did Laney break his glasses? Was that to signify he can finally see? Metaphor motherfuckers.

Goddamn Glenn.  He’s coming down into the city? If he deflowers Sally I’m leaving the Internet.

Still not creepy at all!

I love that Glenn delivers a joke with the exact same tone/speed/pitch as when he describes getting his LAX BRO UNI pissed on. Nice of him to say, “I lied to my friends and said I was going to bang you.” Just the sweetest Glenn.

“Meet me in Africa,” is what all dudes say when women get their period in front of them.

Don’s business meeting with Dow in 2012 terms, “Fuck you, give us your business, you fucking pussy bitches.”

Well that was a tender moment with Sally and her Mom.

Is Glenn going to start harassing Megan? I’m down. At least Megan knows what’s going on now with Sally and that’s she OK back in Rye (Random side note: Westchester County > Fairfield County). I like thy heartfelt goodbye on the phone between Betty and Megan. Wait! I meant they just both decided to hang up at the same time with no acknowledgement that the conversation had ended.

Lane’s dead. I want to be more sympathetic but he’s become an unsavorary character the last few episodes. I feel bad for Don the most, he’s going to have to shoulder an unfair amount of emotional burden but I think that’s what Lane wanted and now I hate Lane even more.

Wait, are they going to show the body?



Oh God.



Glenn is driving Don’s car.

Season finale next week. Hopefully it will be as cheery as the past few episodes. Bye!


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3 Responses to Mad Men Recap While Drunk 05×12 “Commissions and Fees”

  1. Jeannie says:

    I don’t get what Joan does now as a “partner”. I knew she got a 5% partnership, but I figured she’d still keep her “old job”. But now it looks like she sits in the meetings with all the other partners and Scarlett has taken over her “meeting notes” duties – ?

  2. outspokenslacktivist says:

    I liked Kenny’s burn about “I don’t want a partnership, I’ve seen what’s involved,” as though he was going to be forced to sleep with a gross client to get it. Calm down, Kenny, you are not built like a B-52.

  3. Pingback: The Bachelorette Recap and Power Rankings: Week 4 |

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